Sunday, May 8, 2011

hmm can't believe it may

Well its been awhile, I haven't had the desire to write & even tho there are plenty of things i would like to say. I guess it has just fallen into that category of "if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all" :-)

Things have been going good for us, we are staying super busy which is nice but at the same time exhausting. I am throwing myself into school and the boys are SO ready for summer vacation. David is just being an awesome husband and dad & just being amazing! I just love him more each day! We made it thru the anniversary of Davids dad on the 29th of April. I knew it was going to be hard, I just wasn't prepared for the extreme heaviness in which that day brought, I felt like I couldn't catch my breath & I just hated to see my husband hurting and missing his dad. We are coming up on the anniversary of Zeke and I am ready to get passed it, but I also am wishing it would drag out. I can't believe it has been a year. I feel the same emptiness that I felt that day in the hospital, yes I have learned to deal w/ it and keep moving forward but it doesn't mean i don't miss him every single day. I think we are going to plan a little party for him and have a cake and then let some balloons go with messages to him on it. His birthday scares me, I just don't know what to expect and apart of me just wants to skip it.

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