The name hunting has began & until then he is refereed to as baby mango. I was @ my ultrasound w/ my sister and mom when they were asking how big he should be, I told them I have an app on my phone that compares him to fruit or veggies. Last week he should of been the size of a baby mango... hence Aunt Jessica named him BABY MANGO! =)
This time around it is defiantly a different feeling picking out his name. We don't have the excitement of choosing his name like we have in the past we just kind of have this heavy feeling,I can't really explain it. It is not that he doesn't deserve a name he does in fact he deserves the BEST name ever, but just like everything else once we name him it feels THAT MUCH MORE REAL & THAT HARDER TO ACCEPT! It is hard to believe that he is really that sick. I feel great better than I did when I was pregnant w/ the boys. The fact is that w/ out God's supernatural healing he will not be coming home & we know that, but then once you put a name to him (other than baby mango) it is real, it is not just a nightmare that wont go away when you wake up. If we talk about a name than we are talking about the end, we want him to have such a wonderful name, followed by such a wonderful meaning because this might be one of the only decision's we make as his parents & it has got to be a great one! Yes I know God can perform a miracle and I am believing it with all I can you have no idea, but in order for me to stay sane I have to think about the reality as well. What if God's plan of healing is different than our plan? I have to be prepared for that & just because I am doesn't mean I still don't have faith in the one who can heal him right this second! Please Pray that God gives us the perfect name for this little mango, just like God thought we were his perfect parents.
Thank you again for all your prayers we need all the prayer & support to keep us moving forward & leaning on God. Please pray for our Faith to continue to grow it is a min by min battle we have to fight. Pray for strength & wisdom as we try and find the right words to tell the most excited big brothers that their little baby is very sick & that God may take him straight to heaven after he is born. We love you all.